There is something quietly extraordinary about Jessica, the protagonist of Shirley van der Bank’s Life in Three Acts. She is not a superhero, nor a celebrity, and she is not someone who wins life’s battles in one sweeping gesture. She is a woman who learns, through heartbreak and rebuilding, how to choose herself after years of forgetting who she was. And perhaps that is exactly why we should all strive to be a little more like her.
Jessica’s story begins the way many real lives do: full of good intentions and small sacrifices. She believes in love, in family, and in doing what is right. She builds a life around her husband, Drew, and their children. She creates a home that is steady, warm, and full of care. Yet, in giving so much of herself, she slowly loses sight of her own dreams and desires. Like many of us, she mistakes loyalty for silence and endurance for strength. It is only when betrayal shatters her world that she is forced to face the truth—she has been holding everything together except herself.
The first reason we should be like Jessica is that she teaches us that strength does not always look like perfection. It often looks like survival. When the foundation of her life collapses, she does not collapse with it. She allows herself to grieve, but she also chooses to move. She walks away from the comfort that has kept her small, stepping into uncertainty with nothing but determination. That quiet bravery—the kind that comes without applause—is something we can all learn from.
Jessica also shows us the importance of reclaiming identity. For years, she was known as someone’s wife, someone’s mother, someone’s supporter. But when she is forced to start over in a new country, she begins to rediscover who she is on her own terms. Every challenge she faces—finding work, making friends, learning to stand alone—becomes an act of rebuilding her sense of self. We should be like Jessica in this way: not afraid to begin again, even when it means starting from nothing.
Her story is also a reminder that dignity is worth more than comfort. It is easy to stay in situations that look stable but quietly break us inside. Jessica had every reason to stay—the house, the security, the familiar rhythm of her days. But she understood something vital: peace that depends on silence is not peace at all. By leaving, she chose self-respect over appearance. That is not an easy choice, but it is a necessary one.
Another reason Jessica’s story resonates is her refusal to let bitterness define her. It would have been easy for her to close herself off to love, to harden her heart after everything she endured. Instead, she learns to forgive—not because Drew deserves it, but because she deserves peace. Forgiveness, in her story, is not about forgetting the past; it is about freeing herself from it. That kind of grace takes incredible strength.
We should also emulate Jessica in the way she approaches change with humility. Her new life is not grand or easy. It is built from small victories: her first paycheck, her first compliment, her first feeling of independence. She does not chase perfection; she builds progress. In a world obsessed with quick success, her patience is a quiet lesson in what it really means to grow.
By the final act of Life in Three Acts, Jessica has evolved into a woman who loves differently. She no longer measures love by sacrifice but by mutual respect and understanding. She learns that loving herself is not selfish—it is essential. When tragedy forces her to cross paths with Drew once more, she meets him not with resentment but with clarity. She has healed in a way that no longer ties her worth to his approval.
To be like Jessica is not to be flawless or unshakable. It is to be human enough to break and brave enough to rebuild. It is believed that starting over is not a sign of failure but a declaration of hope. Her journey reminds us that we are not defined by what happens to us, but by what we choose to do next.
So, why should we be like Jessica? Because she shows us that courage is not loud, healing takes time, and strength begins the moment we decide to stop living in the shadows of what once was.
If you have ever been or are currently struggling in an endless loop of victimisation, abuse, and manipulation, even after offering your best, you need to read Life in Three Acts and be like Jessica.
Head to Amazon to purchase your copy: https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B0FJZDFJBJ.
